Today i just want to run away, hop and plane and be with my Master. i need to feel the crop till i am a sobbing puddle on the floor, to be bound tight and go to my rock, fucked, used in every way possible, then to be taken into his arms and loved.
It feels like since forever since we have been together, it hasn't really been that long, just feels it. i need to be grounded, to feel whole, to be ME.
i just want things back the way they were before life interrupted us. i know we are working our way back there, i feel his grip of control tighter these days and while i'm doing my best to adjust, i don't dislike it, in fact, i want it, need it, love it.
i know one day soon we will have time together and i will feel better, but then i also know it sends me on a totally different roller coaster of emotions. When i feel my Masters love as strongly as i do at those times, i hit a high, then a low. Master says it erases my hard-drive...lol i think he is right, my mind goes blank and i forget all kinds of things.
But, i would easily take the wipe out for that time alone with my Master. In the meantime, Master keeps this girl on an even keel, making sure i do what i am supposed to and following the rules. i have said many times to my Master that i don't know how he puts up with this crazy girl, who is slightly manic...lol He simply smiles and says, "it's easy, you are my Pleasure".
"my Pleasure" those two little words bring a whole world of light to this girl when she needs it, i really am very lucky.
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